Week 14 only? But I am thankful.

I woke up this morning convinced I was at week 15, but alas...the bump.com told me via email that I'm only at 14. Darn da darn....

Yesterday, my uber religious Christian mother told me that although she sympathizes with my morning sickness pains, that I'm not being thankful enough. To a lady who is super hormonal and actually living the pain, it's not something I wanted to hear. But then later in the afternoon, I read a friend's blog posting about her new baby boy. This friend's story is so incredibly heartbreaking and really resonates with me probably more so now since I'm a mommy-to-be. She is 31, got married a week before I did, conceived easily, had a relatively smooth pregnancy, doing all the right things, eating healthy, exercising, etc. All was good until the day of her son's birth. He came out through emergency c-section fine, but when the pediatrician came by to check on him, they found signs of Down Syndrome. On top of that, he has a case where he has 2 holes in one of the valves of his heart and will need open heart surgery at 5 months. Can you imagine? After excitedly waiting for your new arrival for 9 months...all of a sudden, your world comes crashing down and the healthy baby that you expected turns out to be sick and handicapped? I can't even imagine the shock and disappointment that her family must have experienced, but the most inspiring thing is that she is so thankful and so positive. She doesn't see her baby as damaged or broken. Rather she thinks of him as perfect and as God intended him to be. I can't imagine myself being that strong in that situation, but maybe that's where God kicks in that mama strength that women have once they start breeding kids. :)

After reading her post, it's hard to not shed a tear just because her words and energy are so positive and encouraging. I feel like her community should be the one lifting her up, but her words in reverse made me look at my situation in a whole new perspective. I know that morning sickness and the woes of pregnancy are not candy canes and flowers, but really all I can do is be thankful that I have it. The sickness should be a constant reminder for me that my baby is in there, continuing to grow and that I should nurture it however that I can. The miracle of life is truly a miracle. Only God controls and knows how it all pans out. I feel like I've been taking this pregnancy for granted, saying mean things about how I can't wait for this baby to come out already, and how miserable I am all the time. Instead, I should be thankful that I am still pregnant and that I have to constantly be in prayer and trust that God will provide us with a 100% healthy baby with no special surprises. I could only hope and pray that I could be as strong of a woman/mother as my friend is and all of the other mothers out there who find special strength to raise their kids everyday. So at the end of the day, my mother was right. I do need to be more thankful. Thankful that I'm sick, thankful that we conceived easily, thankful the baby continues to fight on inside of me, thankful for my awesome support system...thankful... :)